Greg Giraldo Quotes & Sayings

“I've always had real trouble knowing what my actual desires and goals are. I've just been dragged along by fate.”

“If you spend five minutes with me or watch me try to balance my checkbook, you can only imagine the disaster I would make of anyone's legal issues.”

“It's hard to distinguish when I was actually struggling from when I only felt like I was struggling - which was pretty much always.”

“There are no black people in Iraq, so how will they know who to shoot at?”

“Little did I know that earning a living at stand-up is the hardest thing you can do. But once I started doing it, I just loved it, and I realized that I was actually kinda good at it, and then that was it.”

“The things that make me laugh are considered smart or whatever, I guess. But stuff that's self-consciously intelligent or self-consciously hip or cool, that doesn't do it for me either. You just try to be funny.”

“The hardest part, for real, is probably when you just don't feel like going on stage and being funny.”

“The reality is I'm not a 'get knocked down and come back harder' kind of guy.”

“The reality is I'm not this person with this driving 'get it done' attitude.”

“Why do we need another station where everyone has a gun? We already have BET.”