Billy Connolly Quotes & Sayings (Page 2)

“It seems to me that Islam and Christianity and Judaism all have the same god, and he's telling them all different things.”

“The great thing about Glasgow is that if there's a nuclear attack it'll look exactly the same afterwards.”

“There are two seasons in Scotland: June and Winter.”

“Heckling is an act of cowardice. If you want to speak, get up in front of the microphone and speak, don't sit in the dark hiding. It's easy to hide and shout and waste people's time.”

“I think my securities far outweigh my insecurities. I am not nearly as afraid of myself and my imagination as I used to be.”

“I have been made redundant before and it is a terrible blow; redundant is a rotten word because it makes you think you are useless.”

“Don't tell me how to do my job. I don't come to your workplace and tell you how to sweep up.”

“Did your mother never tell you not to drink on an empty head?”

“Behind the proscenium arch, you can't always hear what people in the audience are saying.”

“I'm a citizen of the world. I like it that way. The world's a wonderful. I just think that some people are pretty badly represented. But when you speak to the people themselves they're delightful. They all want so little.”