Jeff Foxworthy Quotes & Sayings

“You may be a redneck if... you have spent more on your pickup truck than on your education.”

“Little girls love dolls. They just don't love doll clothes. We've got four thousand dolls and ain't one of them got a stitch of clothes on.”

“If you own a home with wheels on it and several cars without, you just might be a redneck.”

“Look at where Jesus went to pick people. He didn't go to the colleges; he got guys off the fishing docks.”

“If you have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say Kool Whip on the side, you might be a redneck.”

“You moon the wrong person at an office party and suddenly you're not 'professional' any more.”

“I know if mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.”

“We're all screwed up. And the way Christians mess things up is we act like we've got it going on. And if we would just stay in that place of, 'Hey, we're all screwed up and but for the grace of God, none of us have a shot here.' We need to have a sense of humor about it; that's kind of the way I've always faced my comedy.”

“If you ever start feeling like you have the goofiest, craziest, most dysfunctional family in the world, all you have to do is go to a state fair. Because five minutes at the fair, you'll be going, 'you know, we're alright. We are dang near royalty.'”

“I say, If everybody in this house lives where it's God first, friends and family second and you third, we won't ever have an argument.”