Gilbert Gottfried Quotes & Sayings
65 most famous Gilbert Gottfried quotes and sayings. These are the first 10 quotes we have for him. He's a 69 year old American comedian born on Feb 28, 1955.
“I always wish the hotels were like they are in movies and TV shows, where if you're in Paris, right outside your window is the Eiffel Tower. In Egypt, the pyramids are right there. In the movies, every hotel has a monument right outside your window. My hotel rooms overlook the garbage dumpster in the back alley.”
“I have always felt comedy and tragedy are roommates. If you look up comedy and tragedy, you will find a very old picture of two masks. One mask is tragedy. It looks like it's crying. The other mask is comedy. It looks like it's laughing. Nowadays, we would say, 'How tasteless and insensitive. A comedy mask is laughing at a tragedy mask.'”
“I wanted to be a brain surgeon, but I had a bad habit of dropping things.”
“With me, traveling for work is arriving at the airport, checking into the hotel, leaving the hotel the next morning at 4 or 5 to do something like 'The Jimmy and Jackie Captain Crazy Morning Zoo,' doing a bunch of those in a row, then going back to the hotel, and then finally going to the club.”
“I can't even find someone for a platonic relationship, much less the kind where someone wants to see me naked.”
“No, generally I think influence is used as a nice word for plagiarism.”
“I predict one of these two teams will win the Super Bowl.”
“I was Jewish, through and through, although in our house that didn't mean a whole lot. We never went to synagogue. I never had a Bar Mitzvah. We didn't keep kosher or observe the Sabbath. In fact, I'm not so sure I would have known what the Sabbath looked like if it passed me on the street, so how could I observe it?”
“If someone else is paying for it, food just tastes a lot better.”
“There are certain things I don't want to joke about. If it's about somebody else, it's fine. If it's about me, I think it's totally insensitive!”
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