Jerry Seinfeld Quotes & Sayings

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88 most famous Jerry Seinfeld quotes and sayings. These are the first 10 quotes we have for him. He's a 70 year old American comedian born on Apr 29, 1954.

Jerry Seinfeld Quotes
“It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper.”
Jerry Seinfeld Quotes
“We want to do a lot of stuff; we're not in great shape. We didn't get a good night's sleep. We're a little depressed. Coffee solves all these problems in one delightful little cup.”
Jerry Seinfeld Quotes
“There is no such thing as fun for the whole family.”
Jerry Seinfeld Quotes
“A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you don't have a top for it.”
Jerry Seinfeld Quotes
“You have to motivate yourself with challenges. That's how you know you're still alive.”
Jerry Seinfeld Quotes
“I am so busy doing nothing... that the idea of doing anything - which as you know, always leads to something - cuts into the nothing and then forces me to have to drop everything.”
Jerry Seinfeld Quotes
“To me, if life boils down to one thing, it's movement. To live is to keep moving.”
Jerry Seinfeld Quotes
“You know you're getting old when you get that one candle on the cake. It's like, 'See if you can blow this out.'”
Jerry Seinfeld Quotes
“Marriage is like a game of chess except the board is flowing water, the pieces are made of smoke and no move you make will have any effect on the outcome.”
Jerry Seinfeld Quotes
“Once you start doing only what you've already proven you can do, you're on the road to death.”

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